DMs Note: Here’s your chance to Rick Roll your party. Depending on how obvious you want to be, you can swap in a redheaded human man wearing a tan trench coat if you’d like. Drop lyrics in along the way for added effect.
“I won’t do it!” The party hears a dwarf yelling as they enter a town. “Don’t worry buddy, I’m never gonna let you down.” Turning the corner, the party sees the dwarf holding the face of a gigantic owlbear, tears in the dwarf’s eyes. The dwarf is wearing a blazer and roller skates.
An angry crowd of townsfolk have gathered around the two of them, all of them sniffling slightly and sneezing from time to time.
“Richard Kashtlee!” yells one of the women in the crowd, “we understand, but you need to re-home Paul. We’re all terribly allergic.” She sneezes violently, spooking the Owlbear.
The dwarf rolls over to the party and pleads with them. “They don’t understand, we’ve known each other for so long, I can’t give him up.” The owlbear appears frightened as the crowd moves closer. Richard rolls back in front of Paul and pleads with the group.
“Please, we’ll figure something out. If a full commitment’s what you’re looking for, you wouldn’t get this from any other guy. I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling.”
If the party doesn’t intervene, the crowd creeps closer and will trigger a reaction from the owlbear, who takes a swipe at someone in the crowd and misses. This enrages the townsfolk, who notice the party and ask them to take care of the owlbear. “We’ve been nice about it and see what good its done us?”
If the party intervenes, the crowd will ask them to help take the owlbear away to the forest where it belongs, much to Richard’s dismay.
Background: Richard (who most folks call Rick), was a model citizen until one day an adolescent owlbear was left on his doorstep. Rick took the owlbear in and raised it as a pet, renouncing his Barbarian ways and becoming an upstanding member of the town. Everyone loved Paul initially, but as soon as he had his first molt, he began releasing dander and other particles into the air that the town is deathly allergic to. The mayor is bedridden and several others are restricted to their homes until further notice.
The townsfolk have cleared an area in the nearby forest for Paul to live, but Rick won’t hear anything of the sort, getting more and more upset the more times it is suggested. The townsfolk are worried things will turn violent soon if they don’t get Paul out of the town.
If asked about the skates, the townsfolk will just say, “no idea, Rick rolls everywhere.”
Rick Kashtlee is less enthused about the new forest dwelling because it’s far away from his pet/best friend and he’s worried about all the monsters that live in the forest. If the party can convince Rick that the forest is perfectly safe, he will reluctantly move Paul out there for the good of the town.
Too Shy to Say It
If the party opts to checkout the forested area where the town wants Paul to live, they will find webs spread across the area that was cleared out. Escorting the party, Rick will begin to silently panic, spinning in a tight circle on his skates.
“I knew it! My heart aches!” He begins to shake but is too shy to say what exactly he believes is happening. As the party tries to get him to come out with it, a singular spider comes out of a tree and onto the web. It comes closer to the party and does not appear to be hostile. As the party investigates the spider, Rick shrieks and skates away toward town.
Appearing from behind the other trees are 4 additional Giant Spiders and 3 Ettercaps. Roll for initiative.
If the party is struggling with the encounter, the DM can Deus Ex Paul onto the scene, sprinting in and joining the fight.
After the ettercaps, webs, and spiders are cleared, the townsfolk will thank the party. They will approach Rick Kashtlee a final time, asking him to move Paul into the clearing.
At this point the party can do a little convincing of their own, working to get Rick to understand the need to move Paul out to the forest and potentially offering to teach him how to defend himself.
Rick eventually concedes and walks Paul out to the forest. As they reach the clearing, Rick and Paul have a heartfelt moment, with Rick squishing Paul’s face and saying quietly.
I’m never gonna give you up,
never gonna let you down,
never gonna run around and desert you.
“That’s right buddy, I’m never gonna say goodbye, I’m moving out here as well.” As he let’s go, he offers a piece of bread to the owlbear who happily gobbles it down.
The townsfolk that have gathered shed a tear at this exchange as Richard grabs his axe and begins to chop some trees for his own home.
The townsfolk thank the party for their assistance and offer them a small amount of gp. If the party checks back in with Rick, he thanks them for helping resolve the situation and gifts them a recipe for his famous rolls which he calls, Rick’s Rolls. When baked, the rolls give the consumer claws for 1 minute. The claws have +5 to hit, and do 2d8 slashing damage.